How often do you tell yourself "I can't do it?"

 

How often do you tell your self " I can't do it?"

I want to write this blog, following conversations that I have had over the last few months, when asking people to support me on ventures, encouraging them to challenge themselves and they reply "I cant do that". You are such an inspiration, with the things you do. 

Over the years I have always been a lover of learning new things. Going on courses, meeting new people, gaining knowledge and semi - stepping out of my comfort zone. 

When I was 17 years of age, I was asked to capsize a small boat and I refused to do it because of FEAR.

When I was 25, I applied for a promotion and after being offered the role, i turned it down due to FEAR. 

In 2005, I was given the opportunity to train to become an athletic coach, I was nervous putting myself forward to learn how to coach people. Once I completed the training, I believed I should know it all, thinking this way put me in FEAR mode. 

When in FEAR mode, what did I do? I would stand behind another coach refusing to coach the children. She would coach and I would discipline, why was I like this because I was not comfortable, I knew that their was more knowledge required. 

Once I was given a file with lots of information for me to study and develop the knowledge I had, my confidence grew. I started to take action.

At the same time I also was attending a level 5 management course, part of the course we had to go on a residential and part of the residential was to do a presentation with a group. I was once again in the FEAR mode and would only say a line in the presentation and I was nearly crying when I did it. 

When I completed and passed the management course, I found myself in a situation of being a practice manager twice, I got a feeling of overwhelm, uncomfortable and due to FEAR, I ran away from the posts. 

When I was introduced to the Chimp Paradox by Professor Steve Peters, I began to realise that my chimp had been in constant control. Over the last 10 years, I have made a conscious effort to take control of my chimp and push him. 

Is it easy? Not all the time and even now I still hear myself saying "I can't do that" this week I was on a zoom and we got talking about running a marathon and I said I can't do that. Interestingly I know I can walk it because I have done the Yorkshire 3 Peaks. 

One thing we have to be aware of when we say " I can't do that" what it really means is " I don't want to do it". What we have to do then is ask "Why do you not want to do it? " 

Is there a reason? Is it a limiting belief? Are you limiting yourself? Are you allowing some one else to limit you? 

This is why I now do challenge myself doing lives, organising community walks, going canoeing, doing presentations online and on stage, all of these make me feel uncomfortable but I do them.

I now organise the challenge yourself retreats to encourage others to get into their stretch zone and grow with support from 2 congruent coaches. I want to stretch myself.